No Provocative Headlines
For many (read—most) articles that people post on Facebook, I do not read them. I read the headlines. I am most likely not alone on this. There are some (read—few) people who I really care about and respect their opinion (mostly people who don’t post often), and I will take the time to read over what they post (bonus points if it is their own creation/writing they post).
And so, when one such friend posted THIS article, I read it, and knew I wanted to write a post on my blog. I love creating content. It makes me feel empowered and successful—especially after feeling overwhelmed by all the junk and ugly attitudes on social media. I never considered myself politically involved until I had some comments from my posts, telling me that missionaries shouldn’t be involved in politics. I thought that posting about refugees and race relations was about Christian duty and love, not politics.
So here is the secret: if you write a thoughtful blog about something you really care about, and don’t have a provocative headline, you probably won’t get any trolls, or anyone telling you to get back into missions instead. But, you probably won’t get many people reading it at all, except the ones you really care about. Some people would argue that the great divide in our country today has been created—or at least exacerbated—by algorithms and how news media is money/click driven. (I think fake news and hating on the media is one thing most of my left and right friends agree on—but don’t tell them that). Have you seen “The Social Dilemma”? Provocative headlines are at the top of this problem.
Now, when I want to post something that may be considered political, I write a whole post. This helps me organize my thoughts and really get down to the point/heart of the matter, as well as avoid provocative headline issues (honestly, I’m not that good at thinking of provocative headlines anyway). And it avoids the people who are looking for a fight. It also keeps me accountable, because it takes a lot of time to write a blog post, so I normally keep my “frustrated rant about the state of Facebook” out of it.
All that said, I wrote this so I could post this. It really is the best thing so far that has put into words my recent thinking. Except I am not angry—I am terribly sad. It feels much like my grieving-sad feelings that I feel in leaving my beloved Brazil home—just with some cranky frustration added in. It is just too exhausting to be really angry right now.
Since I worked this hard already, I will also add some random screen shots I’ve taken, that also add in some more of my thoughts.
If you want to add race issues into it…that’s another post.
Beth Moore has been LIFE to me lately.
Like seriously. I wanna say “Lefties, time out-and sit on your side of the couch” and “Righties, time out—and sit on your side of the couch” and start my individual complaints.
Please take a moment to be a bit worried if you read this. A friend on Facebook posted this. This is what people involved in many far-right things really believe.
I am a pro-life Christian, But...
I am a pro-life Christian. I believe that one abortion is one too many. But If you are protesting in the front of an abortion clinic: you are too late. You are not getting to the heart of the issue and are wasting good time and energy that could be better spent. I understand why you are there- but in our cultural context, it will be misunderstood and detrimental to the very solution you are working towards.
The heart of the issue is that we should all work to make the world a place that doesn’t let any women get to a place where she feels abortion is her only option. This could mean building friendships with women so they feel supported. This could mean discipling and training boys to value women and take responsibility for their actions: this can mean a million and one things before it means protesting in front of an abortion clinic or becoming one-issue voters.
Four things I believe we DO need to be doing:
Working towards better and easier birth control. Birth control for men. Over the counter birth control. Cheap birth control. Many different forms of birth control (because one size does not fit all).
Creating more pregnancy centers and resources for pregnant women. Ones that are focusing on helping the women that goes into the abortion clinic- equally as well as the one who leaves after having an abortion.
Making better adoption policies. I don’t assume to know anything about this world of adoption, it I know it can be made better!
Implementing different sexual education. Where abstenance is valued as a viable option. Where bodies and explained and valued. Where the focus is on learning tools to build trust and protection for men and women- inside and outside of a sexual relationship. Where consent is first and foremost, and you can talk about protection with your partner before you have sex. (This is all true and needed for sex before and after marriage: we cannot force people who do not claim to follow Jesus to follow the way Jesus says to do things morally).
It is important we understand the cultural context, and the bad experiences at-risk women have commonly had with people who protest at abortion clinics. We don’t know how that woman got to where they are going into that abortion clinic- but they didn’t choose to get there- no one wants an abortion- they just feel it is the most viable (or only) option they have.
Standing in front of an abortion clinic- even in 100% love, will be seen as hostile to someone desperate enough to get an abortion, especially as that women will probably already have detrimental experiences with similar people who stand in front of abortion clinics. So what can we all (pro-life and pro-abortion) agree is a good solution for everyone, Christian and non Christian?
That we want to get to a place where no woman feels that abortion is her only viable option. Those who are pro-choice are working to give women more choices- and so should those who are pro-life (we just hope those choices don’t include abortion).
I am a pro-life Christian. I believe that one abortion is one too many. But let’s work together towards a world where no women feels that abortion is her only viable option in the first place.
I was very influenced by the HOLY POST PODCAST episode 352 (the first 20 minutes) and think it is important to realize how many pro-life Christians have gotten sidetracked in politics rather than the heart of the matter, which I summarized in the paragraph above. Also:
Free Will and Abortion
Christianity is a choice. God gives us free will and we can choose Him or not. I believe the best choice is God and His way of doing life. He works with us within the context we are currently at. We are currently, in history, at a place because of various inventions (notably birth control and general better life chances than ever before), that women have (generally, in developed countries) equal power and say in marriage and sex and children. We have never had this context before.
I think we can all agree that free choice is something God values, and thinks each person should have (otherwise, why would He have given it to us?) I believe that women having free choice in marriage and sex and children is the right thing: although I may not agree with how that free choice is used (I don’t think God agrees that we should choose to be away and reject him either).
I think we can all agree that it is wrong to only allow men to divorce, and not women. If we feel divorce is a necessary evil in this fallen world- it needs to be available to both men and women. Historically this wasn’t true because women couldn’t generally survive on their own- especially with children. Leaving their husband- for any reason, including abuse- generally meant a life of poverty, early death, and prostitution: for them and for their children.
I hope we can agree that it is wrong to only allow men to walk away from a pregnancy, and not women. It breaks my heart that abortion is a part of our broken world. My friend said it well, “Legalized abortions gave power to two of the three involved, rather one of the three.” But the power is still given to the man and the woman at the expense of the rights of the baby.
I am sad that I live in a world with 50% divorce rates. I am glad I live in a world where if there has to be divorce- it is able to be done by the woman as well as the man. I am sad that I live in a world with 125,000 abortions every day. I am glad that I live in a world where the number of abortions today is lower than it was before (Row v. Wade) abortions became legal in the USA- and probably lower than it ever was before in history (percentage wise, especially when you include infanticide—but this can’t be proven as statistics were not kept).
I am sad that I live in a world where more than half of children today will grow up without a mother and father all living in the same home. I am glad that I live in a world where more and more women (and men) do not feel they have to sacrifice their health and safety to hold a marriage together for their children to succeed in life.
It is a crazy and often scary time we live in, but it is also a beautiful and brave time we live in. And as a Christian, I need to remember that He is, and always has been in control: not men, not women, and certainly not me. It is not my job to make anyone obey God and His laws- that is the Holy Spirit’s job, and it is blasphemy to try to take it as my own. I can (and will) believe and plead and preach that certain choices in life are right and will lead to a better life: but I have to leave the choice with the person, and love them just the same.
I believe that sex inside marriage is right, and outside of marriage is wrong. But I understand there are a million variables and reasons and situations that lead us places, and no matter if you agree or disagree, or choose or don’t choose to do so- I love you still- the same- as God has called me to do.
I believe that divorce is wrong. But understand that there are a million variables and reasons and situations that lead us places, and no matter if you agree or disagree, or choose or don’t choose to do so- I love you still-the same- as God has called me to do.
I believe that abortion is wrong. But I understand that there are a million variables and reasons and situations that lead us places, and no matter if you agree or disagree, or choose or don’t choose to do so- I love you still- the same- as God has called me to do.
Dear NFL
You feel passionate about something, and have brought it to the front page in a creative, non-violent manner. Respect. But please don't let it become about something you are against, instead of something you are for.
Remember that love wins over hate.
Protesting that makes a difference is one that promotes what you are for, not fights what you are against.
Are you AGAINST our flag and anthem, or FOR saving black lives?
Are you AGAINST police or FOR positive law enforcement that stops people from getting hurt?
You have what America listens to, regardless of race: talent and money. So use it. I'd love to get behind an NFL NGO/foundation that:
Provides tutoring for inner city neighborhoods, to allow black kids to have better lives through education
Provides college scholarships for black students
Provides incentives for more POC to become cops
Creates anti-corruption standards for our police and prison system
Provides incentives for more black lawyers and public defenders
Regardless what whatever was originally intended by taking the knee, it has turned into something subversive and divisive rather than making a difference, something that I believe has been made worse by the tweets of our president.
It also, I believe, was just to draw awareness to a protest: not to create actual change.
So now it is time to move on to the next step- actually making a difference. You can do it: America is looking to you and ready to hear you. Please don't make this about you: make it about the kids and families and lives that really are suffering.